I have problems committing to a bitch called education

I have started back to school full time this semester. The first time since I was 18. I've never really worked hard in school, nor have I known how. Last time I took a full load I wasn't mature enough, nor did I care enough, to really try. Thus why I dropped out. Now at 23, with my own place, bill, rent, a job. I find myself feeling mature enough to apply myself, yet still the same old habits emerge. Procrastination sets in, even now instead of writing out an essay I find myself posting to my Blog. Something I tend to not do. I feel I'm ready to hunker down and do well for once in school. Yet at the same time I don't feel up to the challenge. As if for some reason I'm still not ready.

nostalgia break

I wrote this in highschool...

The Toast

As you look back,At the life you've lived
The times you've had,The times you've missed
People you love ,Come in and go out
The world is harsh,So we all find out
Life is just deaths begin,I say its worth it
When you have friends,Those at the pub
Are the ones I'll miss most,Telling life's stories
And drinking our beer,When death comes knocking
I wont be scared,I'll just have a beer
And be on my way,To see the saint
Who guards the gate,When he asks what life means to me
Ill share with him my memories,Life is short
Deaths not the end,With a beer in hand
Ill take a stand,In front of the angels
And everyone there,Ill make the toast
For all to hear

Yeah, I can't tell if I really had any talent at writing or not. Least I could finish what I started writing...

MMmmm Brains!

As I sat down this afternoon, after previously making a chicken sandwich for lunch, I did my usual routine of turning on the television. After surfing a bit I came across an old black and white John Wayne movie. One of this WWII movies, of which I didn't catch the name. While watching I couldn't help but feel that male actors just weren't as cool as they used to be. Try as they might Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, and George Clooney will never measure up to the likes of John Wayne, Humphrey Bogart, and even Elvis Presley (Who I personally am not that big of a fan). The typical guy can look up to the main protagonist in a John Wayne movie because it's the A-Typical male. He doesn't take a lot of time to say what he has to say. Doesn't bring more attention than is necessary to himself. Can show genuine feelings for a woman to his buddies without the fear that they'll give him shit, thus warranting their respect instead of their sass. Actors of our past were true men, in regards that their service history wasn't only as long as their imdb listing. Many of them served in the military. An ATT Rep I deal with regularly is a former Army Reservist, who had toured in Iraq and Afghanistan. He was telling me how Bruce Willis had gone to visit them, and was staying in a bombed out old Hotel where he and a group of other soldiers were staying. I heard all about how Bruce Willis, of Die Hard fame...Mr. "Yippie Kay Yay Mother Fucker" complained and bitched and moaned about not having a bed, hot water, or even electricity. Had Steve McQueen been able to visit the troops over seas, I'm sure he'd have made himself as comfortable as possible, and would have spent his time there boosting troops morale. Not being a verified Asshat.

Just another reason why actors these days suck compared to those of our past.