A Random Tangent

Sunday morning I was set to go play paintball with the girlie, and my little brother. After getting all the gear packed I still hadn't heard from my little brother about where and when to pick him up. So after calling him around ten times I decided to call my dad. Unlike myself, my little brother and my dad actually have a relationship where he goes over and visits more than two or three times a year. My dad didn't immediately answer, but he did call me back a few seconds later. Turns out he was on his way to Austin. He'll be there for two months to go to rehab for his alcoholism. I've found out what it's costing, and how much of a discount my father has been given because the director is a good friend of my step mom's. While I wound up going and kicking ass on the paintball field, I can't help but wonder if the reason I feel like I had the best weekend in a long time isn't because of the news of my dad. However I also have the underlying feeling that, knowing what I know, if he doesn't stay sober...or worse doesn't even complete the program. That I will completely estrange myself from my father. I find that even though I have all these people to talk to those who can probably understand these feelings the most I don't ever get the chance to talk to anymore. Maybe not for want of trying...but definitely for lack there of, by both parties.